Jumpstarting Life

Very recently, I've started making healthy choices. This is something I haven't practiced before. I finally went to the gym--where I've been a member for a year--and, as I walked out after my first workout, I stepped into the intense sunlight and thought, "Wow. I am truly entering a new world." Entering a world in which people take care of themselves. I've removed an extremely poisonous person from my life--someone who I'd let be my life for the past 5 or 6 months. In his place, I'm pulling healthy people into my life. A lot of these are my CASA friends. Becoming a CASA in and of itself is a step on my road to health. I've started going to Al-Anon meetings, and I'm attending daily. I'm reading Al-Anon literature. I'm applying to many jobs so that I will have options and can actually choose a position that is healthy for me this year. And I've left the strangling grip of Teach for America behind.

For a few weeks now, I've been seeing a LCSW who specializes in counseling victims of domestic violence. She's one of the most positive, upbeat people I've ever met, and I asked her if it came naturally or if she had to work at it. Growing up with an alcoholic father and a bipolar sister, it was definitely something she had to work at. She said that for years, she didn't see any happiness or point in life. She worked retail for 20 years and hated it. At age 50, she went to school for social work, and she now loves her job and her life. She has told me a few times now that I have been given a gift. That point's starting to sink in. I have been given such a wonderful opportunity--an opportunity to design my life however I want it to be. Or, as one of my fabulous, compassionate, and strong CASA friends says, an opportunity to jumpstart my life.